During this phase, emotions are burning. Logic simply doesn`t matter to the left at the height of the emotional divorce. And because the left behaves so strangely, or perhaps in anticipation of the left behaving oddly, the incumbent usually behaves oddly. It is not a good combination. Being single again can feel like hell on earth. For this reason, most spouses left behind try to find a way to postpone the divorce because they always hope that the spouse who leaves will change his or her mind. Can you see what`s going on? In many divorces, the emotional divorce of the left is “crushed.” He starts late, then runs at a pace that seems to get out of control – which is often out of control. Psychological divorce – the process of mental separation and the development of your independence. This is the “real” separation from the spouse. At this point, you learn to be self-reliant.
You can develop an overview of why you decided to get married and divorced. Instead of spending time blaming another person for the divorce, you can spend your time adjusting to divorce while getting to know yourself and building new relationships with others. This is by far the most difficult of the three divorces. But you already knew that, didn`t you? This is the process by which each of you must accept your separation and begin to see yourself as a separate and different person from your spouse. This is where divorce becomes chaotic. Painful. This is the grief you both have to do. An emotional divorce can occur before or after the legal dissolution of a marriage. It indicates an emotional distance felt from the state of one`s marriage or spouse. It is a stage of anger, the feeling of being betrayed and the anger of “all women” or “all men”. Anger convinces the initiator that the other partner, the unjust couple, deserves suffering.
Behind the anger lie many fears and uncertainties about the future, finances and other understanding couples. One or both partners express relationship dissatisfaction or insecurity, tension and emotional feelings on a rollercoaster ride. The more you are with your ex, the more your social circles tend to overlap. This overlap in your friends and family is where the next type of divorce – social divorce – takes place. Social divorce usually doesn`t start until you and your spouse are separated and the legal divorce is underway, but it can last for years. The psychological effects of divorce on couples and families vary, such as: [8:12-14]. The spouse who has to deal with his or her emotions after legal divorce is commonly referred to as the “spouse left behind.” Whatever role you play, you need to accept the end of your marriage and start seeing yourself as a separate individual and no longer a husband or wife. An emotional divorce indicates the emotional breakdown of a marriage, at least for one partner. However, if the legal separation is not complete, it can lead to blurred lines. The roles of the counselor or mediator are: to continue to give the couple short-term tasks, to allow the couple to go through a grieving process, to infer the couple from the “poor me” attitude, to accept the grieving process, and to let the couple acknowledge the divorce process by receiving structured information gathering. The counsellor tries to find common ground or a constructive channel for couples to work towards a fair solution to their advantage. I spend a lot of time with my clients explaining the three divorces.
The key is to understand that if your spouse behaves irresponsibly or irrationally, it doesn`t necessarily mean he or she is bad. They are just trapped in an incredibly rough process. And so are they. You probably do irresponsible and irrational things yourself. Although other studies have shown that the causes of divorce are linked to many factors such as maladjustment, substance abuse, mental health conflict, and unemployment [10,11]. The divorce rate is quite high in the GCC states, which is considered a very serious problem for many families, causing pain and destroying beautiful relationships. It could radically change all family life [9]. Social divorce is usually more difficult when it comes to children. Of course, don`t expect your kids to choose a side. But children often cling to the hope that your breakup will only be temporary and that you and your ex will eventually get back together. (Other friends and family members may do this too, but it`s more common with your kids.) In these cases, the social divorce process is more about acceptance than dividing your social circles.
The good news about social divorce is that, at least technically, it`s not your job. Social divorce is the adjustment that your friends and family (including your children) have to make to the fact that you and your spouse are no longer a couple. Divorce can be a long and often difficult process. Although the time it takes and the stress varies from couple to couple, it is very rarely as easy as you think. In fact, your legal divorce may just be the beginning of the whole separation process. In reality, there are three steps to really breaking up with your ex, and we call it “the three divorces” that every divorced person goes through. Read on to learn more. Emotional divorce can be difficult to deal with because it marks a significant shift in a person`s attachment to their spouse and how they view the future of their relationship. What we think of as a divorce event is actually not one event, but three different processes.
Each of them lasts over a certain period of time, usually several months.